Bungee Jumpin' Cows Complete Lyrics

Alien Gobbler
Arachnidae
The Banana Slug Song
Bloodsucking Friends
Bubba (the Frog)
Dancing with the Insects (Bailando con los Insectos)
Earthquake
Fire!
Food Chain Gang
Groty Toes
Gusano (I am a Worm)
Laws of Physics
National Champion Judger of Cows
One of These Days
Road Pizza Party
Rock of the Earth
Shark’s in the House
Termite Flatulence
Tornado Twist
Undertakers (Decomposers)
We Don’t Wanna Go
We Sail the Winds

ALIEN GOBBLER

When you cut yourself alien bacteria crawls in

Viruses can also sneak in where your skin is thin

Alien gobbler, a white blood cell not a red

Alien gobbler, he chomps aliens till he's dead

 

Now other white blood cells help out our little friend Alien gobbler

They've got antibody weapons that they surely send Alien gobbler

 

Alien gobbler, with antibodies on the go

Alien gobbler, custom made for every foe

 

Histamine alert bacteria's here, killing every cell that's near

Uninvited parasite, alien gobbler time to fight!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

(He's munchin' alien lunchin', you'll feel better when he eats his foe

He's chompin' alien stompin' - alien gobbler go!

Antibodies , set them loose, make the right ones reproduce

Send them off to the war, go ahead and make some more

 

Antibodies kill ‘n’ cut aliens all around Alien gobbler

Or they coat ‘em and the alien gobblers come up and chomp 'em down Alien gobbler

 

Alien gobbler, keeps piggin', just can't stop

Alien gobbler, till he croaks then we send him to the top

 

A river of puss, put the fallen warriors in Alien gobbler

Hardens to a scab, a war memorial on your skin Alien gobbler

 

Alien gobbler, stamps invaders out

Alien gobbler, just give him a shout

© 1993 Mel McMurrin & Kevin Beals


BJC Home


ARACHNIDAE

I think I hear the doorbell

Guess it’s time to eat

My web it is a-jigglin' from some insects’ tiny feet

I’ll wrap you up in silk then I’ll eat your insides raw

You’ll be my insect smoothie, suck your guts like with a straw

 

It’s killer tag and I’m it, don’t you want to play (NO WAY!)

I just want to wish you an arachnidae

 

Webs can be triangular, funnel-shaped or round

Some have sticky trip lines. some dig down in the ground

Others they don’t have webs they chase down their prey

I’m so glad to meet you but I guess it’s not your day

 

When it’s time to mate, its a dangerous dating game

Some spiders eat each other things that wiggle are all the same

The females have a motto that means I risk my life

A husband’s place is inside the stomach of his wife

© 1993 Pete Madsen, Kevin Beals & Mel McMurrin


BJC Home


BANANA SLUG

You know I love my baby

I like the way that she hugs

People don’t understand

She’s a banana slug

 

She’s got just one foot

But she ain’t got no toes

She just hangs out in the forest

Helpin’ it decompose

 

Banana slug Ba na na na na na na (repeat)

Ba-na-na-slug!

 

The way you shake your antenna

You know it gives me such bliss

C’mon, c’mon, c’mon banana slug

And let me give you a kiss

 

Oh when you slide through the forest

You know you look so fine

C’mon, c’mon, c’mon banana slug

And let me feel your slime

 

Now I’m broke up about my baby

Found out she doesn’t need me

She told me just the other night

That she is also a he. Hermaphroditic she’s a...

 

Now some folks think that she’s gross

But I don’t hear that jive

‘Cause if it weren’t for my baby

This forest might not survive

© 1981 Kevin Beals


BJC Home


BLOOD-SUCKING FRIENDS

You get into bed and turn off the lights

Ready to sleep you say goodnight

Then you hear a buzzing getting near

Before you know it a mosquito's in your ear

You try to kill it, you cover your head

But mosquito babies must be fed

You smack and whack, you think you're a stud

But she flies away with a belly full of blood

 

We're your blood-sucking friends. We want to be your friends

We're your blood-sucking friends. On your blood we depend

We're your friends. When you give, you're giving life

We're your friends. Not for me, but for my wife

We're your blood-sucking friends

 

The buzz you hear is her love call for a mate

If a male's antennae hears it, he meets her for a date

Us males are quiet and we don't bite

But can you hear that female, she'll drink to you tonight

 

Us males don't whine or dine • Plant juices taste just fine

 

When we bite we leave spit, that's how we spread disease

Civilizations we've brought to their knees

Yellow fever and malaria in tropical lands

All I spread here is itch, but you're still not my fans!

 

Help out our little ones • Without your blood their life is done

 

I feed frogs, snakes, lizards, salamanders, and fish

Dragonflies and swallows think that I'm a hot dish

Spiders and water boatmen, backswimmers too

They all feed on me, but now I'm gonna feed on you!

 

Wouldn't you like to donate? • You’ll feel just great

 

She was born in stagnant water in a raft of eggs

A cute little wriggler without any legs

Living life as a pupa wasn't much of a thrill

But now she's an adult and it's time to drill!

 

You might like us all to die • But don't even try • I think you'd best refrain • You'll mess up the food chain • Please give your blood freely • We accept type A or B • We vant to suck your blood!

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


BUBBA (THE FROG)

Let me tell you 'bout my froggie friend

He lives in the water and he lives on land

He's an amphibian, he lives in-between

He's got a big mouth and his skin is green

 

He's got a pair of great big bulbous eyes

They drop down when he swallows flies

His tongue shoots out and here they come

Wings and all right over the gums

 

His name is Bubba, he's a big fat frog

Been eatin' bugs all day here on this log

The sky is dark, it's getting late

He'd better croak loud, if he wants a date

 

He’s got long hind legs, would like to be the champ

Of the frog jump olympics down at Angel's Camp

Ya better keep those lovely legs out of view

They're good for jumpin' but they're tasty too

 

He can drink and breathe right through his skin

He's camouflaged so that he blends in

Now to find a mate who will respond

He’ll join the choir down at the pond.

 

He eats buuuugs for breakfast Bugs for breakfast

He eats bugs for lunch Bugs for lunch

He eats buuuugs for dinner Bugs for dinner

He likes the way they crunch He likes the way they crunch

 

He eats buuuug burgers Bug burgers

He drinks bug milkshakes Bug milkshakes

He puts buuuug butter Bug butter

On his bug pancakes On his bug pancakes

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


DANCING WITH THE INSECTS

I snuck into the lab to see what was cooking

I knew I shouldn't be there but I was only looking

There was a big machine there it was made for shrinking

I bumped into the lever, I guess I wasn't thinking

I started to feel funny I was getting smaller

I tried to get away and I shouted and hollered

The machine it kept on going as I stood on the rug

And it didn't stop until I was the size of a bug

 

I looked up and I saw that there were insects all around me

I hid but it wasn't long until they found me

It was an insect party I had landed in

They were jitterbugging, wiggling their exoskeletons

Their bodies were a blur as around we did spin

They were shaking their heads, their thorax, and their abdomens

They all had six legs, the beetles and the fleas

So all of them could dance three times better than me

 

I was dancing with the insects (Bailando)

Bailando con los insectos (Insectos) (2x)

Venga jugar. ¡Vamos a bailar y gozar! (2x)

 

I asked a butterfly if she'd dance with me

I thought I recognized her from entomology

We climbed up and we danced on a sugar cube so sweet ¡Azucar!

And as we danced she tasted it with her feet! ¡Sabor!

She said she had to leave 'cause it was getting late

She took off with some bees and went off to pollinate

Then with some cucarachas I began to mosh

I said, “hey man aren’t you the bugs that I used to squash?”

 

They gathered all around me shouting "are you the one?

Who kills our friends and family just for fun?"

I stared into their compound eyes I didn't want to die

I said, “don’t mess with my garden and I won't hurt a fly”

A Goliath beetle grabbed me and said, “you’re history dude”!

But just in time I grew and gained some altitude

I still do the dance the insects taught to me

But so I squish nobody I do it carefully

 

Tenían tres partes de sus cuerpos tambien

Cabeza, thórax y abdomen

 

Cuando ví la mariposa la conocía

La había estudiado en entomología

 

I don't know why I killed them before

Los dejaré vivír alrededor

Bailando el merenge y la cha cha cha

Tambien conocían a la macarena

 

Ya que estoy grande otra vez

Los dejaré vivír all over the place

 

I was dancing with the insects

Bailando con los insectos (2x)

© 1993 Kevin Beals, Mel McMurrin & Lynn Barakos

 

BJC Home


EARTHQUAKE

Rumble in the distance, land wakes from its sleep

What I feel on the surface started way down deep

The earth's crust is divided into many plates

And where we all live on them determines our fate

 

Where plates slide past each other it's everybody's fault

The pressure it can build when they slow down to a halt

Little jolts release it, but without any brakes

The earth starts dancing - its big booty begins to shake

 

Earthquake • Land shakes • Plates slide - collide

We wait • To vibrate • On nature's wildest ride (repeat)

 

Continents colliding like giant bumper cars

That's how the tallest mountains were pushed up to the stars

India was drifting then rammed into the land

The place it crashed in Asia's where the Himalayas stand

 

The earth when it was forming had no water or atmosphere

Locked up in the rocks you know they hadn't yet appeared

Volcanoes on the surface completely changed this place

By spewing gas like pimples erupting on your face

 

When a plate goes 'neath another its a subduction zone

And with that plate’s destruction shoots up volcanic cones

The Sierras and the Rockies, they were born that way

In the Cascades it's still happening - why St. Helen's was blown away

 

Deep beneath the oceans plates are being formed

When lava hits the water now it goes from hot to warm

It moves across the ocean and says a slow good-bye

‘Cause at the other side you know it's shoved down deep to die

Milkshake!

© 1993 Kevin Beals Pete Madsen & Mel McMurrin

 

BJC Home


FIRE!

Fire! Fire!

 

Caveman cold • Raw food getting old • It dark when sun down • Wild animals all around • Oh - light from sky • It hit a tree • Me scared • But now me can see, it's Fire!

 

Me get more near • Me have no fear • Me like a lot • Ow! - it too hot • Fire can be friend • If treat with care • Me got too close now me don't got no hair Fire!

 

Me bang on things • To make some sparks • Me try sticks and bones • But then me meet the flintstones! • Me figured it out • Now fire my tool • Recipe for fire: heat, oxygen, fuel. That make...Fire!

 

(Booga booga business)

 

When something burns • There is an attraction • With oxygen • It's a chemical reaction • H2O • CO2 • Are some of the gases fire makes for me and you. That make...Fire!

 

Spark plugs fire in my '56 Chevy

This rock don't roll, ‘cause it too heavy

I've got a barbecue now and a gas range stove

Me sitting in me cave and me still cold

Don't play with fire, better watch out now

For Hindenberg and Mrs. O'Leary's cow!

Fire's not a toy, so you take care

Don't be neanderthal, just beware!

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen





FOOD CHAIN GANG

We're the food chain gang We're the food chain gang

We connect everything We connect everything

Food chain ya can't break it or ya know

The pull affects the others and down we all will go

We're the food chain gang We're the food chain gang

 

Well the chain starts out with an oak leaf in the sun

Making carbohydrates - havin' lots of fun

Caterpillar eats it, turns into a moth

Winds up on a log in the belly of a frog

 

Now the log was sittin' by the shores of a lake

Frog became a dinner for a sneaky gopher snake

Snake thinks she's cool cause she's cold-blooded

Long comes racoon eats our reptile bud

 

Please let me explain. The power that pumps you up every day comes to you through a bunch of food chains

 

Racoon was sittin' just washin' his food

Bobcat came and ate him'cause she was in the mood

The bobcat died, died of old age

The insects ate her - into soil she decayed

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


GROTY TOES

I like sports, I'm not exactly athletic but I like to hang out with sweaty fungis in athletic shoes

I'm a parasite I admit. I like one-sided relationships

I'm a fungus, I wanna have fun, I want the opportunity to make you itch

I like throwing out spores and letting them sink into your skin

and let ‘em dig right in

And if the spore can germinate

Because you did not ventilate

Mycelium will infiltrate your skin

Skin and wood are really great

Some plants I also populate

Your feet I wanna irritate with...

 

Groty toes, Groty toes, itchy groty toes

 

Do you like spaghetti bread and pizza

Salad stir fry and roquefort cheese?

Aren't you glad there's antibiotics that are used to cure disease?

My kinfolk are in all these

And dead things would accumulate

If fungus did not congregate

To decompose and penetrate within

So to your shoes let me migrate

And do not try to medicate

Our partnership you'll terminate.

 

We're beautiful and edible

Put us in stew. But you might spew

Some of us are poisonous

Identify or you could die I said

Identify or die (3x)

 

Some like give and take relationships, my cousin Chanterelle got involved with a tree

I'm not a princess but I'm from a kingdom that isn't plant or beast

Including mushrooms, mold and yeast

We do not photosynthesize

The plant kingdom does not apply

Our mushrooms are to multiply - they're fruits

Hidden right before your eyes

'Neath skin and ground you realize

When we pop up you'll recognize

© 1995 Mel McMurrin, Kevin Beals, Lynn Barakos and Pete Madsen


BJC Home


GUSANO (I AM A WORM)

I am a worm

The wondrous worm

It's down under

I love to squirm

To eat the dead

And the living's my toil

And what comes out makes magnificent soil

 

Gusa nonononononononononononononono sí (2x)

I aerate the earth as I tunnel and squirm

I am proud to be called a worm

 

Our tunnels flood

It rains all night

Come up for air

We're killed by light

When people die worms attend

Even when it’s dull

But no one comes to a worms’ funeral (oh no, I’m not bitter!)

 

A robin's cute

Have you not heard?

Of the massacres

By the early bird

We do such good

From us you could learn

But you make us fish bait in return - thanks a lot!

© 1993 Mel McMurrin & Kevin Beals





LAWS OF PHYSICS

These are the laws of physics.

You're busted, uh huh - you know you cannot break the law

Can't run, can't glide, can't take a ride,

Can't stop, can't move, can't bump or groove

Without the laws of physics

 

You're riding your bike down the block

You hit a rock and your bicycle stops

You were movin' fast wind in your hair

Your bike has stopped, now you're flyin' in the air

You wish you were skinny with a little less fat

'Cause the bigger you are, the bigger the splat

And you hit a bunch of kids, like a bowling ball

You know the harder you come, the harder they fall - It's the law!

 

Your parents said to go clean your room

You've been workin' at it hard, now you're sweatin' with a broom

They just wouldn't listen when you made your plea

I didn't mess it up, it's just entropy!

It's the universe's fault, it don't got no heart

Everything put together falls apart

Wish I could freeze it to minus four fifty nine

Then the atoms wouldn't move, and my room'd be fine - It's the law!

 

Pull over there, with the lead in your shoe

What's the matter officer? The matter is you!

I clocked your speed 186 thou.

Going much faster than the law will allow

I know the rules, I won't give you a fight

If you've got mass you can't go the speed of light - It's the law!

 

Everything is attracted to all other things

The greater the mass, you know the greater the cling

My booty was attracted to the ground the other day

That's gravity at work in a painful way

My attraction to Tina is more than gravity though

Not all attractions are explained with physics you know

But I'm glad she's attracted to the planet Earth with me

Thank goodness for the law of universal gravity! - It's the law!

© 1993 Pete Madsen, Kevin Beals & Mel McMurrin


BJC Home


NATIONAL CHAMPION JUDGER OF COWS

My grandpa was an O.K. Farmer

I’ve got a lot more respect for him now

Well I never knew about his achievements

He was the national champion judger of cows

 

Moo moo sing moo with me now

We're udderly impressed we wish we knew how

Your bovine secrets please share with us now

We'll be national champion judgers of cows

 

The world's seen many great leaders

George Washington, Napoleon, Mao

Well big deal, all they did was lead countries

They weren't national champion judgers of cows

 

Mozart, the Jacksons and the Beatles

Wrote music we all listen to now

Well that stuff that they wrote was real purty

But they weren't national champion judgers of cows

 

Now Magellan was a daring explorer

But on his ship he'd often stand on the prow

And lament to the waves and the heavens,

"I'll never be national champion judger of cows!"

 

Galileo, Drew, and Curie

Made discoveries we benefit from now

They became scientists because they couldn't cut it

As national champion judger of cows

 

Joe Montana, Michael Jordan, Wayne Gretsky and Pele

All deserve to take a bow

‘Course none of them will ever be satisfied

They're not the national champion judgers of cows

 

Jesus, Mohammed and Buddha

Did miracles that made people say, "wow!"

Well they might've been good at those miracles

But not national champion judgers of cows

 

So all you kids out there listenin'

Please take this solemn vow

Don't be doctors or lawyers or teachers

Be national champion judgers of cows

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Gary Beals


BJC Home

ONE OF THESE DAYS

One of these days we're gonna rule the world - we already do (2x)

 

Life used to be soft, till the shells gave them might

The seas were ruled by the trilobites

Then imagine being grabbed by something 7 feet long

Sea scorpions were nasty but now they're gone

Devonian was ruled by fish

Now most of them are just a side dish

So what if the sharks are still around

Hey tough guy, come on up on the ground - HA!

 

Next the amphibians did their land/water thing

Imagine earth ruled by a salamander king

That's when I came along, the star of the show

240 million years ago

The reptiles were the next to take charge

Big deal - so they were kinda large

They say Tyrannosaurus ruled

But now he's just a fossil fuel - HA!

 

Yes I'm the greatest you've ever seen

You might call me the cucaracha queen

You may look down on me now

But I'll outlive you anyhow

 

The mammals were the next to think that they were the best

But look how many have flunked the test

Woolly mammoth and the Cave bear, and saber toothed cat

They were bad long ago but now where are they at?

Whales may think they're unsurpassed

But history proves that big things don't last

You're superior that's what you think

We'll be partying when you're extiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinct

La cucarachaaaaaa

© 1993 Peter Madsen, Kevin Beals & Mel McMurrin


BJC Home


ROAD PIZZA PARTY

Party party party, it's a road pizza party (3x)

 

Lookin' down way below looks like dinner's waiting for me

My vulture pals are movin' in, as far as the eye can see

We don't ever kill our prey, we leave that job to you

The critters you hit on the road last night, to you they're just a pile of goo

 

I'm designed for this job, my adaptations I'll share

I'm red up top ‘cause I am bald I've got no feathers up there

I don't got nothing against parasites, but don't want them on my head

Feathers would get gunked when stuck inside the body of something that is dead

 

Road pizza party! Pee-yew !

Gonna have a road pizza party today

Road pizza party! Road pizza party is the vulture way

 

We are big heavy birds it's hard for us to fly

Instead of flap we'd rather glide on elevators into the sky

It's a myth if you see us above, it means something has died

What it means is we've hitched a lift on a rising warm air ride

 

I'll have a road toad, and a frog fillet, and a well done snake steak

Gimme a pigeon patty, skunk sandwich how ‘bout a tasty possum pancake

My alternative ways they may seem gross, but before you turn away

The scavenger lifestyle is a role that somebody has to play

That’s right, if you didn't have us there'd be bodies all around, we offer such a great deal

We take the mess you’ve made and turn it into a delicious meal.

 

I'm as gross as anyone else you might ever meet.

When it gets hot to cool myself off sometimes I pee on my feet

I’ve got a secret defense if you try to catch me, tell you what I would do

To scare you away I'll take what I just ate, I'll bring it back up and barf all over you

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


ROCK OF THE EARTH

Melt me down way deep inside

As I cool, let me crystalize

I'm igneous, but don't take me for granite

Burnin’ hot lava - I can be volcanic

 

I'm rock - rock of the earth (2x)

Rockin' and a rollin' since the date of my birth

I'm rock - rock of the earth

 

Wash me with water, blow me with wind

Carve out my valleys, erode my skin

I'm made of mud, silt, rocks and sand

Hardened into rock I'm sedimentary land

 

I've been gettin' worn down high and low

Since 4 1/2 billion years ago

Lucky for me, my continents drift

Earthquakes give me a face-lift

 

Give me pressure and heat and I'll start to change

Make stripes and folds as I rearrange

I'm a metamorphic rock down under your shoes

Be nice to me, ‘cause I can be gneiss too.

© 1993 Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


SHARK'S IN THE HOUSE

There's miles of ocean underneath me

What's messin' with my mind is that I just can't see

What's down below lookin' up at me

Thinkin' of what a tasty meal I could be

From out of the depths torpedo slippin' through the blue

Them beady black eyes have a great view

Of me with my little legs adanglin', don't want a manglin'

From you an unscheduled rendezvous

How do you do? You cordon bleu

No way - uh, uh - I'm outa here

And let me make one thing perfectly clear

You see when it comes to sharks and my backside

You call me chicken, I'll say "yeah, Kentucky Fried"

 

Watch out! Watch out! Shark's in the house! (4x)

 

You been cruisin’ the salty blue H2O

As predator king since 400 million years ago you know

You make no bones about it you ain't got none

You're just a cartilage creature causin' 911's,

You're no fun at a party, cause you feed in that frenzied way

Can't take you anywhere, just leave me outa your buffet

And don't smile at me with those steak knives

Your conveyor belt teeth they ruin skin dives

You know what I'm sayin'? I wanna stay alive, but you know right where I'm at

Your sensory could locate me in nothin' flat

Look, when the scene is marine, I’m a lousy source of protein

So save your guillotine, I’m just lean cuisine

 

What kind of a shark are you? I wanna know before I die

Some sharks can terrify, but some are plain shy

Carcaradon Megalodon could eat a car they say

So what are you a hammerhead, Great White or San Jose?

You must be 50 feet long and weigh 20 tons

A whale of a shark comin' at me I know I'm done for

Say what, Mr. Big stuff

You eat plankton and that's enough?

I was scared for nothin' guess it's true what they say

Sharks they prefer much more tasty prey - they're gourmet

Now it's true there's a few that might take a bite

But for most a human sandwich spoils their appetite

You sharks are all right, I guess you have your place

So live long and prosper, but stay outa my face!

Hey you with the dorsal, I ain't your morsel

You can just take your slicin' and dicin' bootay someplace else

Uh oh, here comes el fin

© 1994 Kevin Beals, Mel McMurrin & Mario Newton


BJC Home


TERMITE FLATULENCE

Went down to the tropics today

Where the rainforest is being stripped away

Everyday we kill many species of plants

The only thing left is gonna be termite flatulence.

 

Termite flatulence

Let the rainforest have a chance

Stop termite flatulence

 

People who need money cut down the trees

To raise the cows for you and me

If we don’t change what we’re doing, and change it fast

Where once was a forest, there’ll be just termites passing gas

 

When the trees cut down the stumps they stay

The termites munch and help the wood decay

Tiny critters in their guts help digest cellulose parts

Like humans eating beans it makes termite...................flatulence

 

Hey Mon! Wo-man!

Help the rainforest stay -----Don't throw diversity away

It's not just the trees -----It's the cure to disease

If you want to do good -----Don't buy tropical wood

It's affecting us all ----- Hear the flatulence call

 

You might wonder what you can do all alone

Don't eat cheap beef till the cows come home

If we all eat more Brazilian nuts

It might slow down all the termite butts... and stop flatulence

© 1993 Kevin Beals, Joel Dunlap & Mel McMurrin


BJC Home


TORNADO TWIST

I was on the Great Plains, thought I felt some drops

I stopped and saw a puffy cloud with an anvil on top

A wind from the south was blowin’ moist and warm

The cool wicked wind of the west was high in the storm

The air was movin’ up and slowly started to turn

Like a funnel that was formin’ now I was concerned

Because it hovered ‘bove the ground, then bent down and kissed her

I said, “look out Auntie Em, here comes a twister”!

 

Twist, Twist, Twist - Do the tornado (4x)

 

I heard a fat roar like a thousand freight trains

Now it may rain in Spain, but the wind was on this plain

Two hundred miles an hour - I was scared as the Dickens

It put a cow on my roof - it plucked all my chickens

It rearranged the furniture around my neighborhood

I got a new hairdo right where I stood

So look when nature throws a tantrum better watch out mister

The spin cycle’s on now - you’re caught in a twister

 

So if you wanna do the dance that is sweeping the nation with gyration

It ain’t hard, all you need is rotation

Stand on one foot and start twistin’ around

Kind of like you’re squishin’ somethin’ into the ground

Get hot down below stay cool up top

If you think you’re gonna hurl then you better stop

Keep on goin’ till you get a blister

Grab your mom and Dad, your brother and sister

You’re doin’ the tornado yeah, you’re doin’ the twister!

© 1995 Mel McMurrin, Kevin Beals & Pete Madsen


BJC Home


UNDERTAKERS

Everybody say hey Hey

Everybody say ho Ho

Now throw your antennae in the air

and wave ‘em ‘round like you don’t care

Say munch it Munch it

Everybody say crunch it Crunch it

The log, the log, the log is decomposing

 

The ants go marching 2 by 2

When things drop dead Plop - boom

Then we get fed and we feed the flower bed Munch it - and crunch it

Will you appreciate - will you be grateful dead? I don't think so- no way!

But we never refuse your refuse Fine dining and - good eats

Can you dig it? You can dig it 'cause we dig it.

 

Even your nose is going to decompose. Because...

We're undertakers can you hear our thunder (repeat)

If it's dead or dung gonna take it under (repeat)

We eat it all for you

Munch it and crunch it

 

The living skin of the earth - Soil

wouldn't exist if we weren't around - Chompin', and stompin'

We ain't Beethoven - we decompose

Our destruction is soil creation Mas-ti-ca-TION!

But we tunnel, we dig, we squirm, we crawl

Garbage and goo - We love it all

Your belly button too will be dirt when we are through

 

break it on down, break it on down

break it on down, break it on down

break it on down, break it on down, break it on down, down, down, down, down

 

Eatin' fast we make Soil

Take it slow we make Oil

We're setting free the sun's energy Nibble nibble, plop drop

Birth to earth Dust to dust

To make the cycle go ‘round - In us you trust

The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out

Munch it and crunch it - we eat it all for you (3x)

Your stinky feet too, will be rotten when we're through

We decompose the symphony of life

When you're already dead you probably won't miss your head

© 1995 Kevin Beals & Mel McMurrin


BJC Home


WE DON'T WANNA GO (DINO GRADUATION SONG)

The Cenozoic is here, our senior year must now end - Oh no, oh, no

Sign my dino yearbook please my freshman mammalian friend - Oh no, oh, no

Were so embarrassed that this could occur

We're being replaced by a ball of fur

Rulers of Cretaceous, Jurassic, Triassic

The only Dinos left are gonna be plastic

 

Nah, nah, nah, nah, - Hey hey - We don't wanna go (repeat)

 

One hundred forty million years, but soon we'll be history - Oh no, oh, no

How did we die - the world's biggest murder mystery - Oh no, oh, no

Was it an asteroid or something else that occurred

Or did we go on to college and evolve into birds?

The last laugh's on you humans, think you're Sherlock Holmes

The only clues we'll leave will be a pile of bones

 

So thanks Thecodonts, but now we're sharing your fate - Oh no, oh, no

The mammals will go on, but the dinos must graduate - Oh no, oh, no

We could've been smart, but instead we got big

Some small ones will survive ‘cause they can dig

It's hard to understand why some live and some die

T. Rex will be dead and a cow will arrive.

 

Gee, it's really been fun! • Remember when that Pachycephalosaurus started whippin' cycads in the cafeteria? • Yeah, what a bonehead • I almost spewed like a Dilophosaur • Hey I can't wait for the senior prom • There's gonna be a band called the asteroids playin’ • We're gonna go out with a bang, man! • I'm really gonna miss you guys • Have a fun nuclear winter!



Don't evolve, don't evolve, ever ever!

Here we go dinos, here we go

We are excellent, we're wick’ brill’

We’re the class of negative 65 mil

© 1993 Mel McMurrin & Kevin Beals


BJC Home


WE SAIL THE WINDS

On a leaf of green from water I came

Through photosynthesis, oxygen’s me name

We sailed into the great blue yonder

All through the air we did wander

Till we were sucked into somebody’s nose

Past snot and hairs down the tube we did go

 

We sail the winds, the blood and the leaves

We’re O2 gases that meet with a C – We’re air - Arrrrr Breathe in

 

Through pharynx and larynx and trachea too

The walls of the lungs is where we went through

We flowed along in a great red sea

In rivers of blood through the arteries

Twas then we were welcomed into a cell

Met a fair carbon lass and for her we both fell

 

As animals burp, they breathe and they sneeze

They send different gases out onto the breeze

The carbon dioxide is what the plants use

Providing the creatures with food and oxygen too

 

We broke down that sugar here’s what we did do

We bonded together to make CO2

Back into the blood and through breath that smelled bad

We were set free and adventures had

Till we reached a plant and we ended our ride

The stoma gates opened and let us inside

© 1993 Pete Madsen & Kevin Beals